Tuesday, April 20, 2010

I've a confession to make...

A precious long distant friend of mine called me "Jeremiah" today. I'm not sure exactly what it was that prompted her to compare me to that particular guy in Scripture, but it made my heart race... for I have a special fondness for him.

Oh my, I love that book in God's Word. I love Jeremiah's heart. I was drenching myself in Ezekiel and Isaiah and Jeremiah when I was first called to teach. I ran to those familiar Scriptures that I had been saturating myself in when one of our ministers called me from church for the very first time and asked me if I would teach a class. I ran to their place because I had the same words come from my throat that they did:  "Ah Sovereign Lord, I DON'T KNOW HOW..."

Yet, I had already made the cry, "Here am I, send me," - to do whatever He called for and whatever He wanted me to do.

Day after day after day God had "woken me morning by morning to listen like one being taught." In my initial panic He said to me: "I have put My Words in your mouth and covered you with the shadow of My hand.... listen carefully and take to heart all the words I speak to you... go now, and speak My words to them... Say to them, "This is what the Sovereign Lord says,..........'"

Yet I was like Jeremiah, but "I am only a child" (because I felt very much like one... even at my age!) ....

And I was like Moses, but "I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to me... I am slow of speech and tongue."

That's when I got my, "Do not say, "I am only a child!"  And then, you must go to everyone I send you to and say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you and will rescue you.... Who gave man his mouth? Who makes him deaf or mute? Who gives him sight or makes him blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go: I will help you speak and I will teach you what to say.... I am the Lord, Tell ... everything I tell you."

My fear whispered to the One that knows our tremble, "Since I speak with faltering lips, why would [they] listen to me?"

And with tenderness (more than aggravation) He reminded me of what He had said again....that He would be with me... that He would help me to speak... that He would teach me... that He would put the words in my mouth. He reminded me that "the word of the Lord came to" all those of long ago.. and that "the word of the Lord" still comes(!)... and that it had been coming daily to me for years now as I had come to Him and sat at His feet to listen to Him in His Scripture so that I might to hear Him in His Word and know what He had/has to say.

Then He said with a shake of His head,"You are to say everything I command you." No more. No less. Sharon, how hard could that be?

Well, really?

REAL hard!

But God wasn't letting me go there!

I know! I knew! He really had put the words in my mouth as He did to both Jeremiah and Ezekiel.

He had held Ezekiel's tongue shut until it came time to tell it. He had done that for me, as well. But then, it got to the point that I had about held it for as long as I could. I was about to burst from within! He knew the bubbling inside me and the fire that I found as hard to contain as Jeremiah himself was having when he said: "But if I say, "I will not mention Him or speak any more in His name," His Word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot."

Though scared, God knew I felt the fire and that I felt the same way! Indeed, I needed an outlet or I would burst. But I didn't know how to tell it. And I didn't know what to say. And in my tremble, as I made-up my face for somewhere I was about to go, I popped a tape inside my player, grabbing the first cassette that touched my fingers. I had no idea what it had on it to play. While I painted my face for the day and began to listen to the voice on the tape that had been recorded, I still was wondering with Him, "But what, Lord? What would I teach?"

And that's when He so sweetly said to me through the voice recorded on that tape I had just "happened" to grab, "What is that in your hand?" What did I have in my hand? Make-up? I was getting ready to go somewhere. And that's where the birth of my first series 'Dressed To Die For' began. The first ladies' class that I'd ever taught.

What a trip that was!... that first class (and every class since). I was scared to death! And I didn't know how. And God did what I couldn't do! I didn't just feel as if I had walked on water with Him.... we danced! He lead me in a dance like I've never danced before! I held His hand with all of my might, I held on for dear life ... and IN HIM I found it! He lead me the whole way. I don't think my feet ever touched the ground. Oh my... how I love Him so for letting me be a part of what He did! I wouldn't trade that stretch that He called me to go beyond from my comfort zone for anything other journey. That was, indeed, a heavenly calling! A path lit up and prepared by the Lord. It was a Heavenly High that I am still soaring on!

Thus far in my pilgrimage as I walk this earth, I have so enjoyed our journey. You know the song: "My God and I go in the field together. We walk and talk as good friends should and do. We clasp our hands, our voices ring with laughter. My God and I walk through the meadow's hue."

That's us!

That's me and HIM!

There's no kind of walking, like His kind of walking! There's no kind of talking, like His kind of talking. He's my BIGGEST THRILL every day and in every way... and I love our walk through this life that He's given to me. I can honestly say as those said that walked on the road to Emmaus "Were not our hearts burning within us while He talked with us on the road and opened the Scriptures to us?"

I've a confession to make: I'm in LOVE with my LORD and I live every day to tell of it! I'm often scared (Often? Did I say "often"? It's more like always!), it's not always easy, it's almost always a stretch, a great stretch from the zone of my comfort. But there is no other thing like it. There's a thrill in knowing you can't do it alone. You don't have the boldness, nor the power, not the equipment, nor the ability without the supernatural help of your God!

Incredibly it is today that God reminded me of all this. For tomorrow (again!) I am being taken out of my comfort. This new road that I walk with my Savior on scares me. I literally shake and shiver both inside and out on this path that we're walking. But as long as I know that it is my Lord that is not only holding my hand but also leading.... I'll go wherever He sends, I'll walk wherever He wants me, and I'll say whatever it is that He is so faithful at giving me to say.

Here am I, Lord, all over again. Send me to the places that You want to, just always let me know that it is You that is leading! For He goes before and He'll be my rear guide!


  1. Oh that is wonderful! I love these scriptures. You are so very special Sharon and I am thankful you are sharing this journey with all of us. :) xoxoxo

  2. Thanks so much, Katie, for the encouragement. This journey I am on is daily blowing my mind. God does indeed love stretching us from all that we're comfortable with. He seems to be stretching me especially big lately... and though I try not for it to be, it's often a very scary thing. "Fear not," right? Because "I am with you," He says. So I try to fight the feeling.... and when I don't win the feeling battle, I go forth instead despite my fear. Ahhhh... knees knocking! :)