Monday, June 14, 2010

Seeing behind the "Seens"


Pondering aloud....

You know.... you've got wonder what all your prayers do? What it effects? What it changes? What it does - that human eyes don't know? What it moves - that was stilled until then? What now happens that wouldn't have - if you hadn't? What doesn't happen - because you did?


I wonder if it's part of Heaven's tale that's told when we get there? Will it be part of our "Entertainment Tonight" for our viewing with pop-corn and coke and plenty of butter... with milk duds and hot tamales and all your favorite kinds of candies? Will it be a kind of "The rest of the story" (as Paul Harvey would dub it) to show us our prayer's trail (where all it went, who it touched, what it changed, what it kept from changing, all its affects) alway to its end? Will our eyes finally be opened to see what all went on "behind the scenes"............. or behind the "SEENS" as I've decided to call it? Wonder what all goes on 'behind' what we can see [behind our "seens" (or, our "unseen seens")] that is actually more real than what we can?

I've been praying for a girl, her boys, and her ex-husband for how many years now? Several! There are many "behind the seen" scenes that went un-seen that are too shameful and horrific to tell in their saga. I watched (as a guest in their audience) a lot of their scenes myself. Time won't let its moments be recaptured, but time also fades (and sometimes distorts) the memory to a different story from what actually happened even if I could find the words to contain exactly what happened. Of course, what good would it do? I don't know the full story of it anyway. Sum it up to say (without seeing all the scenes behind it), I prayed so hard for that girl and her boys and her marriage. I so asked, cried, begged, and pleaded with God to put back together again what man couldn't. "Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall," I'd pray. "Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty together again....." but I knew God could! And so I prayed so hard asking Him to! It didn't seem to work. Divorce was threatened. Filed. Fought for. And finalized. It was ugly to the last drop! Mean! Mean! Mean! Vicious! And ferocious! Yet even the pen hitting the page to sign and to sever (what was once promised in a vow not to) didn't stop the ugly from its continual shredding. It's been how many years now? And it's still mean. Finished... but still not done. The fire still flames in an ever growing fury from the fuel of its hatred - that's wrought out in an ugly mean.


Even after all of that, STILL! I still KNOW the One that can! And for some crazy reason I'm still hoping Him to! The One Who can put back together again the shredded tears and tears (as in the 'tear' that rips, and the 'tear' that drips!) of mean. So still I ask Him to! God's gotta cup-full of the tears I've cried in all my asking for Him to help do it. Just recently I cried buckets about over it all over again.... telling Him to let us SEE His GLORY here (because He indeed would get the Glory if done), because no man can repair that mean that He Alone can mend.


The 'seens' haven't changed. (Nor the scenes either for that matter.) The 'seens' that we can see still look ugly and mean. But one thing is different that makes me wonder. It 'appears' to be an even uglier 'scene'. But when I saw it, I couldn't help but wonder if it's because we can't see "behind the seens" of it... and that maybe it's not as ugly as it seems? Maybe the "seen" carries an "unseen seen" with it? And ah, that's what I was hoping for anyway.

Here's what happened. See the stage. Watch the story. We're not in its final act. But perhaps Part 3? 

This scene ("seen") shows the girl in a hospital. Horribly sick. An exaggerated and nasty looking rash all over her face. Her feet and ankles are horrendously swollen. Her feet don't just look blue, but they've turned black! Her hands cover her bowed head that aches so horribly that her hands can't stop holding it. Her eyes stay closed, but squinted tight in efforts to stop it. And her breathing is so haggard and labored and loud that my mama and hers were scared that it'd stop. What I didn't know is that she's been afraid something has been wrong for a long time. So instead of going to a doctor, she's been avoiding them like the plague. As if by her running away from them could make it not so. As if denial could fix it. As if refusal could refute it. As if disbelief could cause its disappearance. I understand that. It sounds like the very exact thing that I might would do. Running from reality, because you don't want to face it because you don't want it to be true.

Suffice it to say, the girl lies in a hospital bed as I write. They're doing tests. She's feeling better. I plan to go see her soon. But what my hope is........... that I have told God again and again and again, "Whatever...... Whatever, God! Whatever! You do whatever You can do to get their attention! You do whatever it takes to get it. PULL them, DRAW them, (YANK them if you must), but please do something to bring them back and put them back together again! Because even apart they're miserable! The hurt won't stop because they won't forgive. And both are still lost without the other."

Jesus' death brought Life! Sometimes so does ours. Not always a physical one (and I definitely hope NOT so in this case), but death of something none the less, to bring Life! For after all, sickness can be the very thing used to make one well.........................................

I don't know.

But, I do know my Hope! And I'll continue to pray. But because of my recent cried-out prayer and the hope that I still hold on to, and her mid-night's rush of last night's venture, I almost feel like that it's a wild route to my answer.. and that perhaps for just a snippet of a second that I got to peek in and to see behind the 'seens' to the unseen one..... and then, I got to see a glimpse of another 'seen' that's not happened yet (them getting back together again). Okay, so I'll admit it, I'm an optimist till the very end!... and sometimes even after then! :)

Thinking about it, I feel that I have also gotten to peek behind several other "seens" that still are not yet seen, as well. Perhaps one day I'll write a book for real? And title it: "Seeing Behind the SEENS!" .... A book that peeks behind the scenes ("seens") to tell the greater story." With stories that show the horrible things that often happen in life that are actually and in reality just being the package that answered prayers are brought to us in. Cause like I said earlier, death is often the very thing that brings life. Sickness is often the very tool used to make well. Blindness can often be used to make the person see. Prisons can be the place that God uses to set the captive free. The list goes on and on, ashes often brings beautiful.... in all kinds of creative ways.

Oh well, that's a ponder for another day. Meanwhile and until then my petitioning continues for God to SHOW HIS GLORY HUGE in their lives. And ours! I'll keep asking Him to join and to mend and to heal all that has such desperate need to be done to redeem and restore and right back again what's been left broken. I'll keep praying for both the "seens" and the "UNseens seens"..... and hope that when it's done that they (and we) can see as Peter and James and John did on the Mount of Transfiguration, "they could see no man, save Jesus Christ only" all over again!

And hey, never loose hope in your 'seens', because there are always 'unseen seens' waiting somewhere behind them. Your 'seen' might very well be the package that your hope is delivered and dressed in. For whoever would have thought that Jesus had to die to give us life? Things are not always as they're seen or like they seem............................... And the play is not over under the curtain comes down. But then again, that's really just when real "Life" gets started.

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